I’ve been such a bitch for the last couple weeks. And for once in my life, I will say it’s hormones. Any other time, I’d be like, no, it’s not PMS, I really just can’t stand you. But no. This is above and beyond.

As my dear friend Kat once said, I hate everyone and everything they stand for.

The rope of my patience isn’t so much a rope as it is frayed cotton thread. That said, I’ve not been big on conversation or discussion lately. I really don’t want to talk about things. I want direct requests. Grunt, point and gesture.

Also don’t suck at driving. I already had some hilarious road rage issues before the hCG came into the picture (read I yell at things with my windows up and occasionally I’ll honk if something almost takes out my apparently invisible car). But the hormones.. oh my god.

I mean, seriously, how do you NOT notice that your turn signal is on for an entire 2 miles when you’re driving side streets? And people. You’re allowed to drive the speed limit. In fact, it’s encouraged. According to the DMV, driving slow in the fast lane can frustrate other drivers WHO KNOW WHAT THE HELL THEY’RE DOING! Honestly, what is the point of driving in the Carpool/HOV lane if you’re not going to go any faster than the outermost lanes?

Oh, right. Some people like to be douchebags.

And speaking of douchebags, if you’re going to drive like an asshole, at least use your turn signals properly. And by properly I mean use them when you’re switching lanes, especially if you’re weaving in and out of traffic into dangerously narrow openings. And don’t leave them on for the next 2 miles.

Okay, last thing on shitty drivers, and this one is scary: talked to a guy at the DMV who mentioned that he failed the vision test. I asked if he got corrective lenses and he said he did, but he doesn’t like to wear them because they get in the way.

They get in the way of what?! SEEING CLEARLY?! Seriously. And he was like, I’ve never caused an accident, blah blah blah.

That’s terrifying.

So anyway, the last few weeks have been tough and I’ve had some pretty solidly bitchtacular moments. I’m so so so sorry if you’ve found yourself in the line of hormonally fueled fire.

That’s mostly for my parents. If they actually read this.

On a happier note, I’ll hopefully know if my little bug is a ladybug or a gentleman…y..bug.

Let me rephrase that.

Hopefully, by the end of Friday, baby will no longer be an “it.”

Happy thoughts happy thoughts! And to baby: please don’t be shy. This is likely the only time in your life that I’ll say this, so mark it well and don’t forget the context: spread your legs.

This week. My oh my this week. Long story short, I skipped 1/2 of my workouts, deep fried a variety of wontons and potstickers (though by the time I finished cooking, I had no interest in eating), and had a generally bad week.

See, my whole thing is that I hit the gym or pavement before I start my day because I’m tired by the time I get home from work and I have to cook on top of that. This week, I was tired both before and after. I slacked. I slacked hard. See, instead of waking up at multiple times throughout the night, I’ve started waking up at 5 am. Every day. My alarm is set for 6, and you wouldn’t think that an hour makes THAT much of a difference.

Au contraire.

That snooze button and I have become embarrassingly well acquainted. Frankly, I need to disable it at this point.

So yeah, my sleep schedule is off, therefore my workout schedule is off, therefore I feel like a total lethargic mess and I just want to get off my butt!! Fortunately, between walking Toby to the vet, yoga, and shopping in the Fashion District, I did at least get back into gear this weekend.

I’m also having a hard time gathering the motivation to cook frequently because I just want to put my feet up and tune out for a little while when I get home from work. However, mama’s gotta eat, and frankly, eating out racks up the dollas quickly. So I cook.

That and I hate having other people in the kitchen doing nothing but complaining. I mean, if you can see that I have a dish of 50 wrapped/to-be-stored potstickers AND a pot of wonton soup going, you really don’t have to tell me you’re starving. Seriously. It’ll be done momentarily unless you want to eat salmonella turkey wontons.

Cough cough dad cough.

Cough.

That said, I’ve learned that unless you’re rubbing my shoulders, asking what you can do to help or continuing a light conversation, stay out of the damn kitchen when I’m cooking.

I’d say it’s a hormonal pregnancy thing, but it’s not. I just feel hormonally emboldened enough to say it.

So anyway, cooking. It’s been difficult and I’ll admit that this week included breakfast for dinner and happy hour bar food with the rest of the office.

But man were those wings good! And the place had a salad bar, and you know I was all over that.

Anyway, tough week, but I’m looking forward to enjoying the rest of my day off.

Seriously. Thank goodness for Labor Day. Don’t know what I’d do with myself if I didn’t just have a day to do nothing.

This week:

1. Cook 4/5 nights

2. Get back on schedule with workouts

3. Keep up on fruits & veggies

4. Disable snooze.

Taco tuesday is probably one of my favorite days of the week. I. Love. Tacos. And when you’re cooking for a group, there are few things more convenient than a taco bar. However, it can get a liiiiittle unhealthy at times, so here a few ways to keep them on the healthier side when you make them yourself.

1. Grill your meat (I’m a big fan of carne asada or citrus marinated chicken). Sorry – baja style fried fish tacos are out, but feel free to grill up your pescados

2. Cook up some fresh frijoles! I understand that refried beans are WAY easier to make, but I recommend making them fresh. If you must do them out of the can though (because fresh beans take a while), make sure they’re the vegetarian/lard free variety.

3. Make your own salsa or guacamole! Fresh fruits, veggies and herbs not only taste better, but don’t include tons of sugar and extra preservatives and such.

4. Use lettuce instead of tortillas. Eat more leafy greens, reduce carbs, and add a really nice contrast in texture.

5. If you’re all about the crunchy tortilla shells, oven bake them instead of fry them (just use an olive oil spray to get it to hold shape).

6. Sautee mushrooms and substitute them for meat.

7. Skip the cheese – I KNOW, I know, it’s my favorite part, too, but spare yourself for the sake of your cholesterol. If you’re adventurous, try vegan cheese instead! It’s significantly lower in fat and cholesterol, and in all my experiences with vegan cheese, I can’t tell the difference. Granted, I’m not eating it by the slice, but it makes a great topping.

8. Substitute ground turkey, veggie crumbles or cooked shrimp for ground beef.

Super simple, super tasty, and there are a lot of ways to get everyone to help!

Enjoy!

Dreaming during pregnancy can be.. intense. My dreams have always been interesting, but never were they THIS vivid. And telling.

So I’ve had 2 dreams where I had my baby way too early. In the first one, the baby wasn’t a baby as much as it was a fluffy white cat.

Yeah, I birthed a full grown fluffy white cat.

I felt SO unprepared and SO sad that I was missing out on having an actual baby, but I still loved it. In the meantime, baby daddy also had a new girlfriend and for some reason, she ended up with baby and me in his absence. While I prepared the nursery, they played on a playground and I felt rather jealous that the baby seemed to be having more fun with her. However, I knew that it was important to do what I needed to to give the baby a place and the things it truly needed, including sustenance (though I couldn’t nurse it because it was a cat). By the end of the dream, the nursery was put together and as I felt more ready and baby had gradually become an actual baby.

In dream 2, I had baby early (it was at week 14) and it was full grown and perfect and healthy, but again, I felt unprepared because I hadn’t gotten anything for the baby, and I was disappointed that I didn’t get to enjoy the rest of the pregnancy and bask in the bump. However, I again knew what I needed to do and while baby didn’t have a nursery until the end, it was okay. It was more the feeling that I was missing out on a big part of the experience, between the anticipation and time to prepare.

On the plus side, in both dreams, baby was a girl.

So ultimately, I’ve realized that I feel rather unprepared as far as the nursery and physical things are concerned, and that’s okay. The only things I’ve bought are things for me, namely a breast pump and clothes (yep, I’ve added maternity leggings and a couple long & ruched t-shirts to my wardrobe) – I kind of want to hold off on the actual baby things until I know the gender for sure. Fortunately, it should only be a couple more weeks before we get to find out.

Other dreams have been of the horror movie variety, one where I grabbed a bow (sans arrows) from a friend’s garage down the street and just played around with it and worked on my form while talking with a coworker. As we were about to walk in, this Halloween ornament ghouly thing came from the same house came floating at me and tried to rip the bow from my hands. The coworker just kinda stood there and tried to get inside. I eventually got the bow and got inside, but good lord was that thing scary looking. It was like a little ghoul head with cheap fabric draping from it. And floating at me.

And then there are the sexy dreams, some involving women, most not. The quantity is definitely outreaching the usual amount of sexy dreams though.

So there’s that.

In the meantime, I’m in this weird limbo. I’m really not showing much and I still can’t feel Bugomatic moving around in there. I don’t have morning sickness and the food aversions are completely gone. I don’t have to pee constantly yet, and as much as I do have to go is likely due to the 100oz of fluids per day. Aside from the occasional (okay, maybe not so much occasional.. often-times-a-weekly?) bitchy morning and the round ligament pains accompanying angrier sneezes, I don’t really FEEL pregnant. It’s like your liver – you know it’s important, but you don’t really think about it.

Except you think about it a lot because it’s not your liver, it’s your spawn, and it’ll have a liver of it’s very own to live unaware of until college.

I’m sure that I’ll miss the crap out of this feeling in a few months when I’m walking around with a blimp under my shirt.

Anyway and overall, I feel kind of anxious because I don’t feel as connected as I want to. I know it’ll come with time, and what I feel now and throughout the rest of the pregnancy is nothing in comparison to what I’ll feel when I actually get to meet the baby. I know there’s no “you’re supposed to feel like this or that.” And I know that the connection comes at different times for different mothers.

Long story short, hormones suck and I’m reading far too much into this.

But I’ll talk more about how much hormones suck next week. In the meantime, you can ask the people who sit around me at the office how much hormones suck. I’m sure they could all tell you themselves.

So pretty interesting – I’m still not putting on baby weight yet. Initially, I’d lost 7 lbs (morning sickness + food food aversions = negative weight) and I’m now getting to a steady point where I’m putting back about 1 lb a week (so I’m 134 from 132 a couple weeks ago). Still not showing much, but I’m loving what little bump I do have – I seriously LOVE wearing form fitting things to show it off because it’s just so cute! Still looking forward to getting bumpier and hoping I don’t explode at like, 6 or 7 mos like a few stories I’ve been hearing.

Per last week, I DIDN’T treat myself to a croissant because by the time it was treat time, I didn’t want one PLUS I stuck it out on whole grains as best as I could (even when brown rice was starting to sound like a punishment). WOO! Also, I only ate out twice – pretty proud of myself there.

*Note: Subway’s bread does NOT toast well. Don’t do it. It’s kinda like eating stale bread with a crouton edge. Also, the Buffalo chicken sandwich doesn’t taste like Buffalo chicken at all. Nor is it in an way spicy. So not worth going out.

The habit of night-before prepping still hasn’t quite set in, and I’ll be honest. There were a couple nights when I had cereal, fruit and yogurt for dinner. Pretty bad, I know, and but at least they were my last required food groups of the day.

This week: Keep building on prepping and set a menu ahead of time.

And the workouts. My knees protested at their first encounter with the treadmill, and while I got through it well, I realized that sometimes, you have to go easy on yourself at first. So I switched it out: 1 treadmill, 1 elliptical, 3 walks with Chubs and yoga. However, Chubs and I increased our walks to 2.5 miles instead of our usual 1.5.

This week: 2 elliptical, 1 treadmill, 2 2.5 mile walks and yoga.

And the shoes are even more awesome than I had hoped! Perfect perfect perfect. :)

A big big big congratulations to Janice (@fitcheerldr), mamavation sista of the week! She’s a bamf and has been truly inspirational as I’ve been working toward whipping my prego butt into shape. Keep it up!

So have a great week, everyone! Keep up the good work and be well!

Hello hello and welcome to another edition of Foodie Friday. This week, we’re highlighting an amazing, delicious superfruit: The mango!

Mangos are delicious, but tend to be a little obnoxious* once they get to the chopping block.

*This is the part where I would have included an Annoying Orange video link if there was one with a mango.

Anyway, there are a couple super simple, much cleaner ways to cut a mango, and while I can describe them in text, it’s a lot easier to demonstrate by video.

I know the video isn’t me, but frankly, my video was hilariously bad.

For lolz, I included a link to it anyway.

So it’s simple, it’s awesome, and it looks really nice (for those of you who are all about the presentation). And holy wow is it delicious.

Enjoy!

This week. It’s been interesting. I was feeling great, much better after the cold from Hades and I was much friendlier as a result. On top of that, I’m now noticeably bumpy, but still not in the apparent-to-people-who-don’t-know-me stage. Actually, it’s more like the look-like-I’ve-been-overdoing-the-pub-crawls-to-the-rest-of-the-world stage.

However, I got a call from the OB early in the week with the test results from the Cystic Fibrosis screen and I’m a carrier. If daddy is a carrier, there is a 1/4 chance that our baby person will have Cystic Fibrosis.

Unsettling thought to kinda sit with you for a few weeks while they process daddy’s labs, but honestly, the odds are on our side.

See, he and I are very similar in heredity, so we’re both 1/2 European mix, 1/2 Salvadoran. There’s a 1/25 chance that the European side would be a carrier and 1/46 chance the Hispanic side would be a carrier. So we have to go with the likeliest side on this one and say that at worst, there’s a 4% chance he’s a carrier, and across the board, less than 3% of Americans are carriers. On top of that, there’s a 50/50 chance that I’ll even pass the recessive gene on to the Bug.

BTW, this is for all of you gamblers out there who need a little help getting back into the swing of things for football season.

So anyway, we have an appointment with genetics after our next ultrasound (at which I’m HOPING we’ll know whether or not Bugomatic is a he or she). Frankly, it’s a whole lotta worrying that may be completely needless. The meeting with genetics isn’t even definitive and IF daddy’s a carrier, it’s basically a warning to watch out for symptoms.

Thing is, I’ve opted out of most of the other pre-screenings. See, regardless of whether our baby has down syndrome, spina bifida, cystic fibrosis, one eye or 6 fingers per hand, we’re going to love it. It’s our little person. I wouldn’t terminate the pregnancy and if there isn’t some kind of safe prenatal treatment, I don’t need to know. Yes, there are ways to prepare for those things before the baby comes, but frankly, I’ve realized that there is only so much you can do to prepare. It’s a little person, and just like any full-sized person, they share certain basic needs, but each one is SO different.

There are going to be curveballs and it’s okay. There’s really no set-in-stone “this is how every baby is going to act so this is how you prepare” kind of thing. It’s not to say I’m not preparing, not by any means. But I’m comfortable saying that there are things I won’t be able to prepare for, and it’s not just me.

However, fingers crossed that baby is going to come out healthy and safe with a long life expectancy.

And 2 eyes.

I love carbs. Carbs are an amazing, wonderful thing that our body uses as fuel to power us through the day. However, all carbs are not created equal and some are much better than others, like veggie carbs and whole grains. Included in that number are potatoes, which are rich in starches which include resistant starches that act like fiber.

Long story short, potatoes are good! And there are very few people who don’t like mashed ‘taters, right? So lets get creative here!

I love my taters with garlic, maybe bell pepper, definitely with cheese. So we’re making Cheddar Garlic Mashed Potatoes!

Serves 4
Est. prep time: 10-15 minutes

The Ingredients:

3 Large Potatoes (or equivalent small potatoes)
1 Cup Shredded Cheddar Cheese
1/2 Milk or Water
2 Cloves Garlic (minced)

The Instructions:

1. Boil your potatoes. I recommend keeping the skins because they’re high in nutrients, but if you don’t want to, you don’t have to. If you do peel, do so before boiling so you don’t burn your hands. Trust me on this.
2. Once your potatoes are nice & soft, cube them and toss them in a blender with your 1/2 cup of milk. You can add more as needed or preferred. Before you have a nice whip (like while it’s still chunky), add your cheese and garlic. Now blend to your preferred texture. I like a little bit of a chunky texture, myself.

Voila! You’re done. Seriously. It’s honestly that simple. If you’d prefer, you can also add sour cream for a nice tart taste. Additionally, you can sub out garlic for chives for a baked potato treatment.

So don’t be afraid to eat potatoes – seriously. Carbs are good (when you’re using them, so keep working out) and potatoes are awesome (when they’re not fried).

Enjoy!

This week was probably the best yet – I was finally feeling up to hitting the gym again, and boy did I. 3 days of 20 minute elliptical interval workouts, 2 days of Toby walks and 1 kickass session of yoga (with a bonus round of volleyball at the beach today) have left me sore all over.

LOVE this feeling!

It’s not masochistic when it’s for your own good. Unless it’s spinning.

I’ve been keeping up on eating healthy, though I’m having a really hard time making sure I’m eating whole grains instead of crappy sugary carbs. I’m such a sucker for croissants.. seriously.

So this weeks goals:

1. 1 croissant. Friday treat. The rest? Whole grains. None of this enriched bleached flour nonsense.

2. Prep more at night so packing lunch & snacks doesn’t take the whole morning. Ahem.

3. No more going out to eat. This one is going to be the most difficult, I know, but it’s so easy to say “eh, it’s just today.” Three days a week.

4. 2 treadmill workouts, 1 elliptical, 2 walks with Chubs and yoga. Def wanna keep this ball rolling!

OH OH OH, that reminds me!! I’m very very excited and I have to throw it out there: Nordstrom Rack is the best place ever. Seriously. While I would love to sport some Earth shoes, I’m a soon-to-be single mama and crazy good deals excite me. That said, I just got some awesome new running shoes for $25. LOVE!!

There are few ways better to get me back in the gym than new kicks, and I LOVE these! Especially the neon green shoelaces. I think they’re probably my favorite part of the shoes.

That and the fact that they’re super lightweight, supportive in all the right places and comfortable. That’s important too. Actually, that’s the most important. The shoelaces are just a bonus.

Also, I have retail issues. Just throwing it out there.

Anywayyy, congrats to Shawnee, sista of the week! It’s well deserved! And thank you to Earth Footwear (whose shoes I’d love to sink my feet into) for sponsoring this weeks blogging carnival!

Hope you all have a lovely week and I can’t wait to see what you’ve all been up to!

Last week was my first appointment with my and Bugomatic’s OB and I came in with one question, but I’ll get back to it later. Bug & I are both healthy and we’re all right on track with where we should be. I’m getting the tiniest bit of bump (see Dailybooth) and while I’m not quite in need of maternity pants just yet, I have gotten a Bella Band for my super cute jeans that are just too snug.

Okay, so I couldn’t button one of them before the baby anyway. Don’t judge me.

BTW, Bella Bands are basically the fake-out shirts* we wore in high school but a billion times better and I’ll probably wear mine forever because it beats the crap out of layering camisoles.

*I went to high school in Huntington Beach (read the stoner hub of the OC). At my high school, instead of cracking down on the drug problem that faced our over-privileged, under-supervised village of teeny-bopper suburbanites whose lives were SOOOO hard, (seriously, in my 4 years of high school, there were something like 8 drug related deaths in the district and 5 of them were students from my alma mater) supervision decided to crack down on the dress code. That way, they wouldn’t get sued.

So if you raised your hand and any piece of skin was exposed, you were sent to supervision and forced to wear an XXL Doc Marten’s tee. Ridiculous when kids were getting high out of a Bic pen in class, but hey! An inch of skin is a distraction! Because everyone can see an inch of skin when you’re sitting in a super cramped desk in an overcrowded classroom. And being sent out of class in the middle of everything isn’t a distraction. And neither is the teasing associated with the God-awful Doc Martens shirt. Anyway, we started wearing “fake-out shirts,” which were basically Bella Bands but less expensive because we’d just cut off the top of a camisole and wear it under or sew it to a shirt that would otherwise get us sent to the chokey.

But back to the appointment, Bugomatic no longer looks like shrimp! While the sea monkey look was rather cute, the human fetus look is far more becoming. Because it’s skin is still translucent, we caught a glimpse of it’s spine and holy wow was it cool to see the little’s control panel! Ultrasounds are below – cool, right? BTW, if you can tell me what I’m seeing in the second one, I’ll give you a prize. Seriously, I’m sure it’s arms, but I’m not sure what angle I’m supposed to view it and it’s rather confusing.

Everyone asks, so I’ll just say it now: Bugomatic is still an “it.” I may or may not have more information after our next appointment in September. I’m hoping that we’ll know by then, but I still have a strong feeling that it’s a girl.

I really hope I don’t regret putting that in writing later.

So anyway, I didn’t have many questions for my OB because I’m such a smarty-pants-know-it-all-nightmare-of-a-patient-because-I-know-too-much-but-not-really, but then again, she wasn’t offering much information either. Of the few questions I had, though, the most important was whether or not I’d be able to have a water birth at Kaiser’s facilities. As suspected, they don’t do water births. “But there are showers!”

Because that’s what obviously I want. A shower birth.

On top of that, we (babydaddy & I) realized how booked my OBGYN is and how difficult it is to get any kind of appointment with her. I mean, I really do like her, but if she’s THAT booked just for consults, imagine if the baby comes early- I trust my doctor, but I’d just be concerned that it might be hard ensure she’d be there. I don’t want some random person I don’t know strolling in last minute for my baby’s birth, knowing nothing about me or my preferences and dictating my experience. Not-uh. Not happening.

The thing is, I’d initially wanted a hospital/doctor birth because I was a high risk C-section and babydaddy was a high risk C-section preemie. I wanted all resources available and on-hand as a just-in-case measure. However, my mom miscarried my twin in her first trimester and she was a high risk pregnancy in general. His mom had him later in life, which has it’s own associated risks. I’m low risk thus far and very healthy and honestly, there is no medical reason at this time that says I would NEED to be in a hospital to have a healthy labor and birth.

So I’ve decided, for the time being, that I’m going to look into having a home birth with a midwife. If any complications arise, I’d be fine with transferring to a birthing center or hospital and I’ll still see my OB for checkups and ultrasounds and the like. I’d just rather not be bound by my insurance’s limited maternal care options. Additionally, I’d rather experience my child’s birth with someone who built her practice on the belief in what my body was built to do more than a belief in knives and needles.

That sounds harshly critical, doesn’t it? I understand and appreciate the value of surgeons and physicians – really. I wouldn’t be here without them for many reasons. There is a clear need for them, and my baby and I are fortunate enough, in this moment, not to be among those in need of a surgical birth.

So I’m on the hunt for a locally based midwife. Any OC mommies have recommendations or referrals to share? I’d much oblige.

And for those who have asked, yes, babydaddy is being wonderfully supportive and encouraging all of my choices and has been there every step of the way. He’s also excited to be the birthing partner, which blows my mind. I’m not sure he’s really aware of what he’s getting himself into, but I’m beyond grateful.

All in all, I’m really enjoying this thus far. Sure, I can’t have sushi (and wow do I miss it), among other things. But hey, I can charge a Designated Driver tax after 11.

Also, I’m starting a side business. Pregzilla’s Designated Drivers: It’s cheaper than a cab and it smells better.

But it’s been lovely, and figuring out where the baby is situated is pretty awesome. Especially when it’s lopsided and looks like something straight out of Alien. Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on whether or not you’d want to see an oddly lopsided bump in the cube next to you, it only seems to do that at 3 in the morning when the sprinklers go off and we’ve both decided that it’s time to wake up and lay there for an hour.

Yes. Bugzilla has a sense of humor.

On top of it all, it’s been kinda nice to enjoy what the ever insightful Kia so perfectly deemed “the secret time with your bump before it becomes apparent to the rest of the world.” It really has been lovely.

Especially when I’m just laying there peacefully, enjoying some me time and quietly trying to feel for any flutters or movement, and my mom plants her face in my stomach yelling “NANA LOVES YOU!!!”

Really a lovely time.